One of the Spims (though not, definitely certainly not JesSpim) has the terrible affliction of being a rambler. Let this warren of pages stand as testimony to that. And suddenly I have nothing to say... a MIRACLE! Surely it is The Leader Bismuth's good will that has cured me of my rambling. May he be praised for his kindness and righteousness, for lifting this burden from my withering shoulders! Oh thankyou Bismuth, from the undeserved! Thankyou, in your righteousness, for your pity on the unrighteous - aaah, yeah. So, anyway, this is a forum for the ramblers, like me, on the verge of being committed to an asylum. And also for the friends and family of the ramblers, so that they may endeavour to live with their peers' addiction to rambling, and to help them, and assist them, and aide them in their quest to rid themselves of The Ramble. Please, email us, with your confession, beginning: 'I am *anonymous* and I am a rambler' and as a group, we will help eachother to set aside our rambling, and eat more vitamin C. If you do not email us with your testimonials, we will be forced to make them up. So send soon! We will not accept silly, rambling testimonials.
Confession 1:
Hi, my name is Ankorahmajintaverkoffentocklickfirehedgemusterateafrogagnagoshnaheidenburghovanman and I'm addicted to rambling. It started when I re-named myself from Joe and climaxed the other day in a conversation with myself, after hearing some lovely John Lennon on the radio, when the song permanently fixated itself in my brain. In anger I shouted out: 'Oh die John Lennon' then in a more reasonable frame of mind conjected 'But you already are - oh ha ha ha.' And the rest of the in-mates got really angry at that point, and told me to go and drink a spitoon, or eat a recently extracted appendix, and/or sticky-tape myself to the behind of a sumo wrestler or to give myself a paper-cut on a Playboy. Um, oh - oops, have I been rambling? Can anyone help me?!
Please, oh please help - err - Joe, if only to stop him sending us emails. Send in your suggestions for therapies to spimspimspim